Memoir Time 1 - Reflection

I think the time for me when I realized life was much bigger than myself was when 9/11 occurred. I was only 7 at the time, but it made me realize how hostile people were and how at any point in time, a tragedy could strike. Of course I really didn't understand the full story behind 9/11 and why the people who hijacked the plane did what they did, but it was still such a big impact on the United States that I felt sad and scared and from that point on I saw that not everyone was a good person. Another time that I got my first taste of the big picture was when everyone in my First Grade class got sent home with a slip of paper alerting all of the parents about a sex offender in the area who had kidnapped some little girl. My mom explained to me what that was all about, and I immediately became frightened. From that point on I was super cautious and even when I grew older I was super paranoid about being home alone and dealing with certain social and personal situations. Of course this fear rose at an alarming rate when in Second Grade we watched a film on molestation - it was about a boy who was really close with his uncle and who eventually started getting molested and was threatened not to tell his mom about any of. The boy finally did tell his mom, but I just found it very scary and sometimes hard to trust adults. That entire year from First Grade to Second Grade really influenced my view on life. I still of course behaved like normal and enjoyed doing all of the things I loved, like going to school (I loved school up until about the 7th grade), playing with all of my favorite toys and letting my imagination run wild, and spending time with my friends and family, but sometimes those thoughts would creep into my mind and I would become scared. I dreaded being alone in a public place for a long time and to this day I have major fears about flying on a plane, but some of the fears I have grown out of. I have lived in the same place my entire life, and that helped me to overcome the fear as well.  However, I was quite timid during my teen years in middle school because of our neighbors who live near the railroad tracks, about a mile down from my house. My best friend since I was two years old, Liz, used to live about a mile and 2/10 (we counted one day) away from me, on the other side of this house by the railroad tracks. These people that lived there were about as redneck as you can get and they had about 9 people living in a very tiny, run-down house. They housed a few different sex offenders over the years, and Liz's mom worked the night shift at a nursing home in Cedar Rapids, and whenever I was over there, we were usually left alone for the bulk of the night, since Liz's older siblings were moved out of the house and Liz's mom was a single mother. It was very scary to be alone in a house out in the middle of nowhere and hear the wind bang on the door or a window, or seeing a shadow lurking out in the year or in the field. I was almost glad when they moved out of the area for that reason only. Now I know all of the people who live in my area (I live out in the country, in between two small towns), and that helps to know that I can trust everyone there. I had outgrown most of my outstanding fears about being molested, kidnapped, killed, or sexually assaulted, but some of them still linger as a young female college student living in one of the worst places in Cedar Rapids. However, I still am brave and try to hide the fear.